Arts & Culture
Saudamini Deo

I Want to Touch Light

Lying on my bed in the warm glow of the afternoon sunlight, which is now soft but sometimes still unbearable, I started watching, without my glasses, mango leaves move ever so slightly in a blur of deep green and light,

Neem Coal Tar
Saudamini Deo

Pulling the Trigger

After my car broke down last night just outside the city, I walked into this strange lone building looking for some help. The building was empty, only a big room painted red was filled with men, only men—they were beautiful,

Neem Coal Tar
Saudamini Deo

The State of Melancholia

  Looking at my somewhat grim face in the mirror, I remembered what a writer from New York had said to me about the city that is home. Sitting across the table, he had told me that Jaipur made him

Neem Coal Tar
Saudamini Deo

Something is Happening

My eyes closed for a moment and suddenly everything seemed slower. I sat down trying to make sense of it: things were more tactile, filled with more sensuality, absolute feeling—I knew even as it unfolded that it was a dream. Was it?

Neem Coal Tar
Saudamini Deo

What Happens When The Smoke Lifts?

I woke up at 7:30 in the morning from a dream of a woman whose face was covered with the smoke of her cigarette, and even though the smoke must have disappeared almost instantly I couldn’t see her face and

Arts & Culture
Saudamini Deo

Have a Look-See

Her gaze struck me, almost by mistake, as I was leaning against one of the white columns of Connaught Place. I saw her seeing others and we looked at each other, perhaps for a little more than three seconds. I

Arts & Culture
Saudamini Deo

My Name is Red

Last night, the sound of my own heartbeat woke me up. It beat so loudly, so certainly, as if it would continue to beat forever. I lay there listening to it for a while, trying to understand why and how